How to Help Your Pastor by John Avant

I was a pastor for 34 years before becoming a missionary. 

I don’t miss it at all. 

I’m thankful for my time as a pastor and much of it was wonderful. But it is very hard on your soul.  I’m not sure anyone can actually understand this unless they have been a pastor.  Most people who run a business, for instance, don't feel responsible for the care of the souls of the people that work for them.

Now, as a part of our ministry, we get to help pastors. And there’s one word I would use to describe more than half of the pastors we talk to these days. 

Overwhelmed. 

Being a pastor has always been difficult, but currently it is harder than it has ever been. The divisive political landscape, social media stoking new ways for people to gossip and complain, and the impossible demands of increasing anxiety and depression in many people contribute to this.  

People expect the pastor to heal their hearts and ease their minds. 

At times you may need your soul healed and your minds to be at peace. When you do, that is not the role of your pastor. That is the role of Jesus!

As I have shared in previous posts, we seem to have turned everything around in the American church.  We often don’t actually follow Jesus anymore. We follow our feelings.  

Jesus tells us what it means to follow Him:

Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.”

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭16‬:‭24‬ ‭

Following Jesus is an incredible adventure. It will result in eternal joy as well. But it is also hard, sacrificial, and often painful.

Your pastor cannot make that disappear and still help you follow Jesus. 

So how do we help our pastors while we actually follow Jesus?

Change what you expect from your pastor!  

He is a Shepherd. But he is a warrior shepherd like David!  

Recently a pastor reached out to me and said about his people, “They want a doctor, not a general to lead them into battle!”

The change in perspective is what we need.  

Expect your Pastor to lead you on mission. Expect him to equip you for battle. And expect to fight beside him!

Does your Pastor need to “feed you?” Yes, while you’re a baby.  But when you grow up spiritually you’re able to feed yourself. 

If the sermon seems to help others more than you, if the music doesn’t seem designed to make you feel better, but the church provides you a clear mission and a community that cares about you and helps you fight the spiritual battle, your pastor is doing a good job and you have found the right church. 

When the reason you choose your pastor and your church starts with the words, “I like…” you have missed the point.  You don’t have to like what your pastor says or does to be well equipped to take up your cross, deny yourself, and follow Jesus. 

That is his role.  

Pastors often fail. They don’t always follow Jesus well themselves. You can help your pastor by telling him that you don’t expect him to make you feel better. But you do expect him to lead you into mission and into spiritual battle. You do expect him to help you follow Jesus when it’s hard.  

That will help your pastor. That will help your church. And that will help you.  Maybe not to feel better. But to actually be better as a follower of Jesus.